it makes me nervous, writing tid bits

I want to write about you, but it has me nervous. There's something so casual about it all. That lack of concern of words that flow through my lips has me nervous. 

But then there's your lips, always sweetly touching mine. Touching me. Places that I forgot could be kissed. My hair. My forehead. My neck. 

I don't want these feelings, in all honesty. I could do well without them. I don't need to like someone. I don't need to share a bed with someone. I don't need arms around me. I don't need your lips on mine. I don't need anyone's lips on mine. 

But I like that yours are. I like that you want your lips to graze my body. I like that my jibber jabber gets smiles and sweet gazes. I like that you let me soak in the world, in the moment, and don't ask questions. I like that there's a hand there when I need it, and space when it's wanted. I like that you like me, but I don't like that I like you. It makes me nervous. 

It's being vulnerable. It's allowing myself to truly be unguarded. It's believing your words, and having hope that one morning you don't just change your mind right after I decide to let you in. I don't want you to have that power. I don't want anyone to have that power. I wasn't always like this, and now it makes me nervous. 

You make me nervous, but I think I like it. 

l.shane

currently...

thinking about; being free, and enjoying every moment of it. the simplicity of changing one thing in my life, one thing i was scared of changing and how everything is falling into place. already my world is filled with more laughter, adventures, good vibes and good feelings than it has in years.

reading; The Time Travelers Wife, even though i couldn't tell you how many times i've already read it. it's a book i'm a addicted to, a book i write in, a book that i underline the words that cause me to feel alive, or love. if you haven't read it, you should. there's something about the honesty in the words that sparks a nerve in me. that inspires me.

listening to; my music tastes have been slightly, okay not slightly, they HAVE been everywhere lately. one minute I'm bumping Die Antword in my car, and day dreaming that i'm Yolandi Visser, to singing along to Hunter Hayes all while falling in love with that kid. So, I'm either an african bad ass, or a cute little country singer. depends on my mood, right? (and never forget the random rap remix music, or my go to acoustic...)

looking forward to; all my daydreams are in summer right now. the weather is truly warming up here in Southern California and i just can't wait for the adventures that summer brings. night time trips to the hot springs, camping on the beach, secret spots in the woods, natural water slides, nights you don't remember in the morning, the memories to be made (oh, the memories!), bon fires with far too much booze, and just those good nights, with those good conversations that only the desert can bring you.

watching; random things, to be honest. sometimes it will be stand up comedy, to the walking dead (which is over now...), to all the random chick flicks that my heart is aching for.

making me happy; the music coming through my speakers, the sound of my phone going off, waking up and knowing that i have no idea what's coming in the day but they are all good, night time desert adventures, things that are a little bit dangerous but that rush makes it worth it, sweet morning kisses, living with my best friend and having wonderful days even if we're both being bitchy. life is making me happy.

l.shane

honesty corner, begin again

'In here we are fresh...'

That's how this began, this blog, this new project, this new beginning. I'm realizing now that I wrote down those words straight from my heart and onto this screen, but I failed to realize how true those words were. I failed to understand the fresh pallet I was beginning for myself, this new surface that I was finally giving myself reign to figure out who I am, what I was meant to create, and what my heart was brought to this earth to produce. I'm not speaking for the world to see, but something for my soul to be proud of, something that will cause my chest to be full of joy and warmth.

Now with that said, there is a small announcement to say, that is just for myself, but it is worth it to be expressed on Delicate Gypsy, because it matters to Tea at Noon and to me, Laura Shane. Originally, I thought I was going to keep all my old jewelry, my old creations, but I was wrong. I did keep a few, the ones that my heart felt right keeping, but some of them are my beginning creations. And although I like seeing where it leads me, and how it changes, I will start producing all new creations. It begins with ripping everything apart, and starting fresh. It's a breath of fresh air for the realization. In your twenties, in your life, you are constantly growing. Growing as a human being, and this is me, growing creatively.

In here we ARE fresh.
In here we ARE ourselves.
In here we ARE growing.
In HERE we are HAPPY.


I truly appreciate you reading this journey with me, it means a lot.

honesty corner, k a t c h

Somewhere in this world there is an Irish woman, and a feisty Irish woman at that. She enjoys going to a coffee shop, and when you meet her you cannot help but to become attached to her spirit. It radiates from her flaming hair, and you do not even have to speak to her. You can simply witness her from your little quiet corner of the coffee shop, as you both carry on to do whatever you are sitting there to do.

But if you do get the chance to speak with her, you should consider yourself extremely lucky because deep inside she is everything that you ever thought a woman should be. Her strength is magnificent, her wonder has never died out through out her years, and her heart? She's never spent a day not listening to it. She is proof that you can follow every path your heart leads you on, and still never spend a day producing anything toxic in this world.

You meet this woman, and if you have never met anyone like her, it gets you thinking. It gets your thoughts in circles, and makes you wonder what you're doing with your life. It makes you wonder why, at the young age you are, have you already spent time not listening to your own heart? This woman never did anything she did not to do, and she managed to do this without hurting anyone in the world.

In my world, she made me wonder why I do things my heart is telling me not to, or why I don't follow every whim my heart leads me to. Why do I let a silly job put me down so much that when I'm not there I never find myself doing what I want to do? She showed me that I am wasting my own world by allowing something that will not matter in years to come, effect my life and add a darkness to my heart. Those things don't matter, only the light in my heart does. It's simple, and I have allowed it to be complicated. They say November is the month of thanks, and I am thankful for this woman, even if I only know her from a distance. Thankful that I can realize this now, while I am young, while I can change everything. No matter your age, you should start following your heart now. Especially if it is screaming at you to, and you've been ignoring it.

We should all aspire to be like Katch. 

HOME

It's finally here. Tomorrow I get to fly home with Ryan and go see my family (and a friend whom I miss!). Sure, it's only for three days, but I still get to be home, in California. I'm not sure I can really articulate how homesick I've been. It has gotten better, and I am really enjoying the temporary world we're building here, but the west coast just never quite quits calling my name.

I'm beyond excited to see my family, and my baby brother. Sneaking in a few drinks with a good, old friends will be so wonderful. It's a bummer that I  did not turn twenty-one back home, because I feel like part of me is missing out on all these wonderful memories that could be made. But tsk tsk! Mustn't think like that.

So tonight we will be hoping on a plane and arriving home, and then Saturday there is the wedding. The wedding is going to be extravagant. My big brother is marrying a woman that could not be more perfect for him. I'm really excited that she asked me to be in it, even though I'm so far away. It's going to be so beautiful, from the black wedding dress to the old, historic building in the heart of Los Angeles.

Now, I'm really afraid that I just won't want to get back on the plane. Maybe I'll just hide out in Los Angeles. I'm sure I could convince some pretty amazing people to do it with me. Are you guys down for the adventure?

stay tuned&have a wonderful weekend. greetings from the golden coast!
l.shane

honesty corner

Too much passion to narrow it down to one topic,

                                                                         so, it implodes.