free,

SHIT, I'm sorry guys, I vanished. JUST WHEN I WAS DOING SO GOOD. Long, long, extremely long story short I'm home. See those mountains behind my friend and I? Those are desert mountains. California desert mountains. I am home, and I am happy to be home. I feel a sense of self, a sense of freedom, a sense of happiness. This is right, this is where I'm supposed to be.

I'm going to be back soon. I just might spend the next few days or weeks just having FUN. Be back soon.

l.shane

not naked days, button down skirts

I can't believe that the first month of the year is almost over. I know, I know, a month isn't that long, but  so many positive things have happened, that it went by so quick. There were so many positive moments within this much, so much growth. I know this is all mumbo jumbo to you, but it means a lot to me. It's going to be a damn good year.

l.shane

for the love of god, get me off gypsy warrior...

These items don't even need cutsey, 'try to be clever' descriptions. They are just amazing, all of them. I will willingly sign over my first born child to own them. All found, and drooled over, at Gypsy Warrior.

l.shane

not naked days, rosey and gold

outfit details; dress by american apparel, boots by gojane, belt from rue21, boot socks by buckle, jacket by forever 21, jewelry by Tea At Noon

I jump at every chance to wear clothes that you can wear in California, here. This is me jumping, not literally  jumping, but I'm sure you understand. As a side note, this is my natural hair. It's short and there is not very much of it. I really, really am in love with my extensions.

l.shane

finding the music, ten

let her go by passenger
The other night I had a strange breakthrough. To be honest, it felt like I was waking up. Nothing important was going on, in reality I think I was just on tumblr. My mind is never on what I am doing, so of course it was bouncing from thought to thought, not really having a meaning or purpose, and I thought of moment that took place seven years ago. 
I was sitting on a curb outside of some restaurant with my big brother and we were talking about the past, because I was fourteen and thinking I had committed something that was the end of the world (of course looking back now, it was a good experience), and he brought up the object of time. He told me that we can't see time. He even asked me where it was. He showed me that moments in the past don't exist. After all, can you really track them down? Can you visit them, physically? No, you can't. So, why do they have to exist at all? Why do you have to worry about something that happened, and yet there is no record of it?
For some reason, my mind igniting that memory, and those words from my brother, brought me back to life. I honestly feel like I was awaken from a slumber. I think I allowed myself to be asleep for the past two years. I let something define me, that has no right to define me. 
Thank you, Troy. I love you.
I feel awake, and I feel alive. I feel good, for the first time in a long time. 
stay tuned because it's about to get interesting, l.shane

basement life, two

So, I never take pictures of my house. Or, none that I post on the internet usually. Why? Because typically my house actually looks like someone lives in it. It's never picture perfect and everything does not have a special place. But, the other night I'm pretty sure that Ryan and I got taken over by aliens, because we ended up cleaning our apartment till the wee hours of the morning. Not just 'picking up and putting away', but scrubbing and organizing. Like you know those piles of STUFF that you mean to do something about, but you really just don't want to, we handled that stuff. More and more I'm like my mother. Her huge cleaning days always took place when she couldn't sleep, too.

So here it is. Where I live. In my basement. I like christmas lights.

stay tuned,
l.shane

honesty corner, my soul is aching...(fourteen)

Do you ever get that feeling where you truly need to be outside? The warm sunshine on your face, maybe a lovely cool breeze in the air, and being surrounded by trees so tall that you can barely see the top of them. To wander around the woods, whether they be familiar or not, or a park or not, and feel the earth, feel the silence. Bask in the silence.

I know the obvious solution is to go venture into the rockies that I live oh so close to, but when it's 3 degrees outside it seems daunting. I could drive up, and sit in my car, get out and freeze my ass off, but I'm not sure that sounds enjoyable. I"ll most likely end up doing it anyway. Why is it that I'm near one of the most beautiful mountain ranges in the United States and all I do is crave either a) a crappy forrest in the desert of California or b) the luscious green and fern ridden woods of the Pacific North West?

My sea legs and heart full of wanderlust may never be content.